BigZeroLittleZero

*Golfing Realities

* Golf balls are like eggs. They're white, they're sold by the dozen, and every week you have to buy more.

* A pro-shop gets its name from the fact that you have to have the income of a professional golfer to buy anything in there.

* It's amazing how a golfer who never helps out around the house will replace his divots, repair his ball marks, and rake his sand traps.

* When you stop to think about it, did you ever notice that it's a lot easier to get up at 6:00 a.m. to play golf than at 10:00 to mow the lawn?

* It takes longer to learn good golf than it does brain surgery. On the other hand, you seldom get to ride around on a cart, drink beer and eat hot dogs while performing brain surgery.

* A good drive on the 18th hole has stopped many a golfer from giving up the game.

* Golf is the perfect thing to do on Sunday because you always end up praying a lot.

* A good golf partner is one who's always slightly worse than you.
 
* That rake by the sand trap is there for golfers who feel guilty about skipping out on lawn work.

* If your opponent has trouble remembering whether they shot a six or a seven, he probably shot an eight.*